“It should be a privilege to be able to say “I love you” to someone. It shouldn’t be something people say just because they feel like it. A privilege that is earned. They say you have to earn the right to be loved; no, love is unconditional, if you love someone, they don’t have to earn it. But. The right to tell someone that you love them? That has to be earned. You have to earn the right to be believed.”—C. JoyBell C.
“She was terrific to hold hands with. Most girls if you hold hands with them, their goddam hand dies on you, or else they think they have to keep moving their hand all the time, as if they were afraid they’d bore you or something. Jane was different. We’d get into a goddam movie or something, and right away we’d start holding hands, and we wouldn’t quit till the movie was over. And without changing the position or making a deal out of it. You never even worried, with Jane, whether your hand was sweaty or not. All you knew was, you were happy. You really were.”—J. D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye (via larmoyante)
On this train pondering, I don’t even know about what. My brain is running at the speed of light, faster than any light. Thinking has become a bad habit of autopilotism, by default, and unplanned. Everything happens for a reason they say, I’m positive that there’s more than one reason, probably more I can possibly imagine.
What are reasons? What are the perks of reasoning? What is considered a reason? What is not considered a reason? Are there any particular requirements? When is enough enough, and would we ever know?
“It is not fancy hair, gold jewelry, or fine clothes that should make you beautiful. No, your beauty should come from within you - the beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. This beauty will never disappear, and it is worth very much to God.”—Peter 3:3-4, Holy Bible, King James Version
Hey. To answer your question, I'm in Brooklyn (Bushwick / Bed-Stuy). Synchronicity is lovely sometimes. I was writing about Neruda, researching online, and came across your site. You're a rare one indeed. Such a nice collection of pieces. -Drew
Pablo Neruda has the most sensual words ever put together by any man that I know of. We all have poetry within us, it’s up to us to let them come out to play. I’m glad you found my blog, I’m writing more often as of now. The world deserves our thoughts and some one to relate to.
When was the last time you wrote a post about your actual feelings? I can’t remember the last time I wrote some thing amongst those lines either.
Ever since my trip to Miami, I’ve been putting a lot into perspective. Considering that I’m always working, I deserved every bit of that trip and I’m more than happy to have taken the time to take care of myself and put myself first. Sometimes I wonder, how do I do it? How do I make time for a life, for the things that Rafaelina wants? I had the horrible tendency of treating work, family, and other things as more of a priority then my very own happiness. Coming from someone who is well organized, an educated scholar, is good with creating automatic rapport with people, and with a business mentality, I stopped for a moment and thought about the disappointment I felt within myself to not have been taking active steps, simultaneously, with the other responsibilities I had on my plate. However, I am happy to be conscious enough to realize what needs special attention from this point forward.
I’m 25-years-old now, time is ticking, not waiting for me to make up my mind about what to do with time and how to create the life I imagine for myself. Control, I thought, I need to be in better control of my life and be assertive with what I want and how I’m going to make that happen. Invest your time, your energy, and your all into the career and life you want for yourself, is what I told myself. I already love myself, have no insecurities, and believe in the craft I want to dedicate myself to. I am always on the hunt of self-discovery and what realistically would work and what would not. Nonetheless, I believe and know that I’m going to be there in the next year or so.
Literally, in a matter of days back from my trip, I did just that and listened to my beautiful gut (that feeling that never ever lies) and made the decision to take control and give myself a deadline. I’ve made the decision to take my goals very seriously. So many people compliment me on a daily basis, for my simplicity, for my sensuality, for my good heart and “wonderful smile.” It’s a beautiful thing when people that I know and people that do not know me whisper gorgeous words into my ears. Truthfully speaking, I don’t even try to be charming or friendly or considerate, it exudes out of me like a second nature of mine that it is. I like to make people feel comfortable in their own skin, I love to bring them to that point of comfort that they may not feel.
Great things have been happening, mostly because I’ve opened myself to the world, to the people around me, to the sensations, to the doubts and the fears, to the experiences, to the physical pains and heartaches. I’ve opened myself to all of it. Of course, life isn’t always peaches and cream, I’ve been through my share of bullshit and let me tell you it’s extremely difficult to keep your feelings in check - there are so many feelings and so many obstacles and hardships. Still I remain calm and patient, and organize my mind in order to have better control of situations that are not of my liking. It’s surprising how much you can surprise yourself.
I thought one more time on how I manage everything else in my life to the best of its abilities, yet not make the time for myself, for drawing, for writing, to network and spend time with the friends and contacts that I already have, and what I truly envision myself doing. Everyone seems to be focused on their careers I thought again, why haven’t I taken charge of mine? What’s stopping me? Who’s stopping me? No one is stopping me, the only person stopping me is me, was what I thought again.
Taking control and putting my foot down against my own self, against all doubts and demons. I know ya believe me, just watch.
Just a quick thank you. You are perhaps the most beautiful stranger I've yet encountered in this strange little virtual world. So enjoyed reading this blog. Why don't i meet people like you IRL? Blessings and Amituofo! -Drew
Wow, thank you for that powerful compliment! This means a lot to me. Yeah? Where are you located Drew?
To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person you meet.
To make all your friends feel
that there is something in them
To look at the sunny side of everything
and make your optimism come true.
To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.
To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature you meet a smile.
To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.
To live in faith that the whole world is on your side
so long as you are true to the best that is in you.
It amazes me that people think their soulmate is going to show up in their life at this predestined time and be this flawless person. A true soul mate is a mirror of yourself, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. Sure, they have a common upbringing, similar interests but they have the one thing you don’t have which is the introspection to help you become great. What use is a soulmate if they can’t help free you from yourself so you can live your life mission?
“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”—Jim Morrison
“I’ve been in love before, it’s like a narcotic. At first it brings the euphoria of complete surrender. The next day you want more. You’re not addicted yet, but you like the sensation, and you think you can still control things.You think about the person you love for two minutes then forget them for three hours. But then you get used to that person, and you begin to be completely dependent on them. Now you think about him for three hours and forget him for two minutes. If he’s not there, you feel like an addict who can’t get a fix. And just as addicts steal and humiliate themselves to get what they need, you’re willing to do anything for love.”—Paulo Coelho
Many of us have been taught to do our duty. What does this imply to you? For me, ‘doing my duty’ means doing something I really don’t want to do. My heart’s not in it, and so the energy for the act isn’t there. I have to force every move. Usually, there’s underlying resentment. When this is the scenario, tasks may get done but there’s no gift to the world.
We do not truly serve the world if we give to others but neglect our own truth and our own needs. We need to give to ourselves as we give to others. IT’S NOT SELFISH TO LOOK AFTER OURSELVES — IT’S ESSENTIAL!
“When one woman puts her experiences into words, another woman who has kept silent, afraid of what others will think, can find validation. And when the second woman says aloud, ‘yes, that was my experience too,’ the first woman loses some of her fear.”—Carol Christ (via wombspace)